Dealing with modern-day pharisees + worshiping without a church
It is a key milestone for a man, and a massive step forward, when he finds a wife.
She is the second rail, running parallel to fraternity, that supports him, carries him forward, and keeps his mission on track. However, since a wife is a complement to your mission, she cannot be the mission itself. It is good to be a husband. But it is good to be a man first.
The correct order is to get on mission, then find a woman to complement you; but popular culture teaches men exactly the opposite. This idea has wormed its way deep into the modern Church. It is not so much explicitly stated as implicitly taken for granted that “true love” eliminates all loneliness, and that to find one’s soulmate is to become complete. Connected with this, true love takes on divine power, replacing the marriage covenant as the sanctifier of sex. But God designed sex to image covenant love—not romantic love.
All this to say, if you don’t know what your mission is, you cannot really assess whether a particular woman …
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