You can't be a black-pilled Christian

Issue #133

Mar 09, 2023

Black pill guys (incels/MGTOW/etc) are like the new atheists of the 2020s.

You remember new atheists, right? One of their defining characteristics was that they were “secret kings”—they flattered themselves that they had the strength and nobility to see and face what no one else could. They had to think this way because their ideology was such pure nihilistic garbage.

Discipleship & Dominion

The Secret King Complex and putting random people in their place

You can read and share this email on the web: https://notes.itsgoodtobeaman.com/the-secret-king-complex-and-putting-random-people-in-their-place…

2 years ago · Bnonn Tennant

But in reality, new atheists were mostly edgelord punks with poor reasoning skills and strong emotional motivations to rationalize certain beliefs. Mostly it came down to daddy issues.

Black pill guys are generally the same—only the daddy issues have girlfriend/wife issues layered on top.

Now, this might sound harsh, given what many of these guys have been through. But let us explain the analogy.

Understand that we are not mocking their trauma. We are rebuking making trauma a basis for a worldview. We are rebuking the hatred, rejection, and derision of God’s creational designs that we see constantly from black pilled men:—

Derogating marriage and trying to convince others that building a household is wildly risky to the point of wickedness;
Deriding women as uniformly inglorious and subversive, who were created as the glory of man to perfect his work of dominion;
Rejecting God’s charge to pick themselves up and exercise dominion over what they can, by labeling such exhortations as “man up” manipulation tactics from a gynocentric social order—a “blue pill script” or the “old set of books.”

When you start using your trauma as an excuse to ascend the heights of the north and depose God and his design, and you try to drag others down into the pit that you are digging, it is right that the Lord and his people hold you in derision.

It is especially sad to see professing Christians go down this route. We know that often it is Christians who suffer the most when they are red-pilled, and especially when they are divorced and lose everything on the whim of a wicked wife. They feel betrayed by the church, the very institution supposed to stand up for father-rule. And so the black pill becomes appealing.

Yet it is still plainly evident that the black pill is starkly contradictory to the gospel.

You can have Christ or the black pill—but not both. You can have the Spirit or the flesh—but not both.

It isn’t that the gospel is a quick fix for trauma. The Holy Spirit doesn’t reset your life. Rather, taking up your cross and following Christ is antithetical to doing the other thing…which is what black pill ideology requires. The fruits of the Spirit are set against the works of the flesh that are evident in the black pill approach to life.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, meekness, self-control; against such there is no law. (Galatians 5:22–23)

Christianity does not deny the facts that black pill guys fixate on. But it faces those truths completely differently. Its way of reforming the world is 180° from the black pill way. Everything about black pill screams of the atheistic French Revolution—"I have no faith in a loving Father"—whereas Christianity works not through angry upheaval, but through meek steadfastness, as leaven through a lump.

Put on therefore, as God’s elect, holy and beloved, a heart of compassion, kindness, lowliness, meekness, longsuffering; forbearing one another, and forgiving each other, if any man have a complaint against any; even as the Lord forgave you, so also do ye: and above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfectness. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to the which also ye were called in one body; and be ye thankful. (Colossians 3:12–15)

It is difficult to reach black pilled guys, because part of the secret king mindset is to doggedly assert that anyone who disagrees just doesn’t know what he’s talking about. They’re like Guyladriel in The Rings of Power.

But the fact is, we know damned well the kind of horrors that men face. Michael, for instance, has been directly involved with Jeffrey Younger:

Our mission is to call Christians back to father-rule. That starts by submitting ourselves to the rule of our Father—not chafing against it. If you are a Christian fighting against feminism, fighting for patriarchy, we want to be allies to you. We want to build you up, and we want to be built up in turn. We do not want to turn you away, nor treat you as troublemakers or enemies.

That is why we sometimes must share hard words like this one.

Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil… Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:26–32

Christians imaging their Father God do not bitch, rage, or mope—because they know that Jesus is still reigning, still exercising dominion, still progressively ordering the world to make his enemies his footstool. They do cry out to God; they do rage against the passions of their flesh; they do weep and mourn—and the church should weep and mourn with them (Rom 12:15). They do all this in faith, knowing that after the descent into the abyss comes the raising up to glory.

Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed. Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled. Hebrews 12:12–15

We know that cynicism and bitterness are born of disappointment and mistreatment. But Galatians 5 is clear that, because of faith, the Christian life is characterized by joy, hope, contentment, faithfulness, peace, and other spiritual fruits. Enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, and dissensions are works of the flesh, and those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Our mission is to call Christians back to father-rule. That starts by submitting ourselves to the rule of our Father—not chafing against it. Our particular mission is subordinated to God’s greater mission of calling all people to live the Christian life. In our case, that includes warning against being turned aside to the worldly responses of the black pill.

Falling Down—a cautionary tale about the black pill

Falling Down just turned 30 years old.

It is a deeply insightful movie wrapped up in dark humor and cynicism.

A middle-aged man dealing with both unemployment and divorce, William Foster (Michael Douglas) is having a bad day. When his car breaks down on a Los Angeles highway, he leaves his vehicle and begins a trek across the city to attend his daughter's birthday party. As he makes his way through the urban landscape, William's frustration and bitterness become more evident, resulting in violent encounters with various people, including a vengeful gang and a dutiful veteran Sergeant Prendergast (Robert Duvall).

The movie is full of cathartic scenes where Douglas' Foster stops just taking it from society, and starts giving it back. Here is one, where he misses breakfast by a few minutes at a McDonald-like establishment, and pulls out an Uzi:

Scenes like this make you root for him as if he is the hero of the story.

But he isn't.

It's more of a cautionary tale.

The real tragedy at the end of the movie is when Foster realizes that he has allowed the circumstances of his life transform him into the bad guy.

When Duvall’s character, Prendergast, says he can live for his daughter, Foster decides to sacrifice himself so she will get insurance money.

There were many junctures where he could’ve chosen to do that—without dying. It would have been painful, but better for his daughter.

It’s a tiny redemption arc that intensifies the tragedy.

Movies like this especially appeal to the black pill martyrdom of our age. Think of the self-immolation, stick-it-to-the-man-since-you-can’t-win mindset that goes along with much of the MGTOW movement. Abandoning marriage and household. Getting involved in bitter echo chambers rather than healing and taking productive control over the controllables. This happens when men feel powerless and hopeless for the future.

Falling Down is a masterful movie. Douglas makes you realize how easy it is to be "black-pilled" into villainy.

William Foster: I'm the bad guy? How did that happen? I did everything they told me to. Did you know I build missiles? I help to protect America. You should be rewarded for that. Instead, they give it to the plastic surgeon. They lied to me.

Sergeant Prendergast: Is that what this is about? You’re angry because you got lied to? Is that why my dinner's drying out in the oven? They lie to everybody. They lie to the fish! That doesn't give you any right to do what you did today. The only thing that makes you special is that little girl. Now, let's go.

William Foster: You know, I got a gun. In my pocket. I got lots of guns.

Sergeant Prendergast: Stay there. Don't move.

William Foster: You wanna draw?

Sergeant Prendergast: Let's not. Let's call it a day.

William Foster: Now come on. It's perfect. Showdown between the sheriff and the bad guy? It's beautiful. On three.

Sergeant Prendergast: This doesn't have to be the end. You have a choice. My little girl is dead. I don't have a choice. You do!

William Foster: No, you have two choices: I can kill you. Or you can kill me…and my little girl can get the insurance. One…

Sergeant Prendergast: Don't you wanna see her grow up?

William Foster: Behind bars?

Sergeant Prendergast: Don't do this. Please. Let's go!

William Foster: Three.

Foster pulls a water gun, Prendergast shoots him. Prendergast wipes water from his face.

William Foster: I would have got you.

Foster dies.

Is the goal persuasion?

We live in an age where both men and women lack emotional restraint. Therefore, if you wish to persuade, it is generally foolish to use inflammatory rhetoric.

And that’s exactly the problem.

The goal often isn’t persuasion, but rather just sticking it to your perceived opponent.

As a rule, this demonstrates a lack of emotional control, and obviously a lack of love. It’s all about a cathartic release of anger and frustration. Intemperance on display.

You may object to the category of “inflammatory rhetoric”—but biblically speaking, there is such a thing as words that “stir up anger.”

Proverbs 15:1 is sufficient to show this is true:

A soft word turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Soft words aren’t middle-of-the-road weaselly words. It’s important to remember Proverbs 25:15:

With patience a ruler may be persuaded, and a soft tongue will break a bone.

Soft words are powerful. They persuade. They break bones.

This isn’t to say that there’s no place for hard or sharp rhetoric. We have been sharp toward black pilled men in this very newsletter. But such tools belong in the hands of temperate men—men who have learned to rule their spirits.

In that vein, understand that even soft words will be labeled inflammatory rhetoric by hard-hearted cry-bullies. Don’t let them rob you of a biblical truth by overreacting. Let their outrage and complaints look all the more ridiculous when compared to your self control.

How Michael gets so much done

On our Discord server, one of our members asked Michael how he gets so much done. Because he does get a ridiculous amount done.

Here’s what he said:

I’ve learned to leverage three skills I developed over the years: stacking, networking, and team building.

Stacking: I try to make everything I do count twice or more. E.g.:

If I write a sermon, I rework it into social media content.
If I outline a book to develop leaders at my workplace, I do it with an eye towards using it at our church.
As I look for land to build a massive permanent (not leased) facility for my company, I look for land where my company could then sell us 5 acres for a church building.
If I fly to the church conference, I use that time to answer workplace emails.
If I fly to a tradeshow, I write my sermons.
If I go to Home Depot to buy wood for the farm, I bring my son with me to have a heart-to-heart.

I care about efficiency, but I care more about the ability to repurpose or make my activities multi-faceted.

Networking: Last night in a matter of two hours, I talked to Doug Wilson, Dale Partridge, Joel Webbon, Chris Wiley, and a high-up manufacturing rep brokering a deal with Siemens.

That’s pretty common for me in any given week. I’ve always been good at making friends and contacts, and keeping up with them over the years. I enjoy meeting people and hearing their stories. Many of the people that are a big deal now, weren’t when I first met them.

Anyhow, having a big network allows you to make things happen that others couldn’t.

Team-building: I don’t work alone on anything. I knew I needed someone else to make IGTBAM happen. Enter Bnonn. East River was launched with a 3 person advisory board that quickly became an elder team. I manage our salesforce through 2 training coordinators, a quality assurance analyst, and team leads that function as assistants to me. Our house and property is broken down into different responsibility zones assigned to our children on a rotating schedule. My next three books are all co-authored.

I put all my effort into where I’m strong, and recruit others to complement me where I’m weak.